The Underground’s certainly delved into some horrifying food topics in the past (none of which have been American Heart Association Approved), though we remain solidly behind the slaw dog as fly fishing’s premier fuel.

Still, when the Underground’s Crack Team of Internet Surfing Slackers Online Food Operatives stumbled on this, we knew we had to post it.

Finally, a worthy appetizer for the Slaw Dog: The French Fry Coated Bacon On a Stick

Imagine: all the grease of bacon & frenchy fry breakfast, but nothing fouling your fly line when lunch is over? Can industry-wide adoption be far behind?

Are you all abandoning your jobs and opening French Fry Coated Bacon on a Stick street carts?

This, my lovely herd of Undergrounders, is no less than yet another Underground-powered breakthrough in fly fishing’s culinary zeitgeist.

See you in the coronary care unit, Tom Chandler.

ps – for something far healthier, visit the Chile Underground’s latest fish post.

When I fly fish, food isn’t usually the main item on the menu. You throw down a sandwich or gnaw on a Powerbar, slug down some water, and keep fishing. It’s the norm in fly fishing, and if the fish are eating flies in a big way, it makes sense.

Still, what’s been lost is something so rustic-yet-civilized, I can’t help but mourn its passing: The Civilized Shore Lunch.

Fishing in Maine exposed me to the traditional shore lunch — a time-consuming affair where the guides build a big fire, fry up some fish, boil onions and potatoes, sear steaks, and finish off the waistline-expanding meal with homemade pie.

Maine shore lunch in full swing.

At first, I was annoyed by the time spent away from fishing, but later — after it became clear the shore lunch was the point of the fishing trip for most of the participants — it became a highlight of the day.

The food was great, you got to practice the new fishing lies developed during the morning’s fishing, and the guides pooled information for the afternoon’s fishing.

Of course, stuffing yourself with a metric ton of food creates the possibility there won’t be an afternoon’s fishing, but that’s the beauty of a free society; you can take whatever you want from an experience.

New West’s Bill Schneider posts about his shore lunch experiences, and while the menu is different (the potatoes are fried, beans are heated in the can, and the onions aren’t boiled), the point of the exercise is clearly the same.

He even lays out the steps needed to build a big shore lunch (these guys and these guys even provide hints and recipes).

A Recipe for the Shore Lunch Comeback

It’s hard to imagine the shore lunch ever making a big comeback among fly fishers — it’s typically the province of guides in remote Northern latitudes — but I’ve got a plan.

I think fly fishing’s ready for some enterprising guide to offer The Ultimate Meal: The Slaw Dog Shore Lunch.

Face it — the ingredients are cheap, no trout are harmed, preparation is quick, and fly fishers even wear waders, so cleanup would be as easy as hosing off the anglers in the party.

Sure, a real Slaw Dog Shore Lunch would mean the guide would have to also carry an emergency angioplasty kit and defibrillator, but that’s a small price to pay for the throngs of clients who will surely come.

Once again, the Trout Underground makes the world a better place for fly fishing guides, free of charge.

[tags]fly fishing, fishing, shore lunch, new west, slaw dog[/tags]

From Alert Blog Reader Anonymous (would you want to be identified on this blog?) comes startling (and distressing) news of another culinary craze sweeping the south:

The Kool-Aid soaked pickle.

Truly the mind reels. Some dillhead (get it?) has taken a perfectly good dill pickle, and then soaked it in Kool-Aid. And got someone else to pay for the result.

The Apocalypse is approaching. This is a sign.

[tags]pickle, kool aid[/tags]

Chris Raine has packed up his shiny new Airstream trailer and – with his just-graduated, headed-for-the-Air Force Academy son in tow – is headed for parts of the West commonly associated with big trout.

Because the technologically challenged Raine refused to install a digital satellite uplink dish on his trailer (or buy the equipment needed to make it all work, including a laptop), we’re going to have to make do with the messages and photos relayed via his son’s cell phone.

First stop was apparently Ketchum, Idaho – home to the Big Wood River (one of my favorites), Silver Creek, and the mega-dollar estates of Sun Valley. With Silver Creek at his front door, and some of the West’s most spectacular (and expensive) real estate looking back through the windshield, what did we get from our adventurer?

OK, so our first installment touches on a familiar subject – food. It’s clear that Raine likes to fish, but – if his spectacular performance at the Great Slaw Dog Cookout was any indication – it’s clear he likes to eat even more. Still, his hastily texted message offers some hope of actual fishing information in the future. To whit:

From Ketchum: Big Wood blown. Silver Creek OK. Windy and cold. No hatch. Try again tomorrow.

No fishing for me last night, but I’m out of here this afternoon. The Upper Sac continues to fall, and I’ve got a couple of midriver spots that are probably just getting wadable. They’re on the radar, I’m on the Internet, but not for long. See you on the edge of your seat, Tom Chandler

The Upper Sacramento continues to fall, and it’s conceivable we could be fishing reasonable flows in another 1.5 weeks or so. As it is, Wayne Eng and Steve Bertrand are finding rising fish at their better high water spots, and you can bet that I’ll be running in that direction soon.

Still, my Monday experience on the upper river suggests it’s not all wine and roses out there, and whenever you hear about some of the local sticks hitting fish, you’ve gotta realize those fish are typically the payoff for a lot of time spent on the river. Simply put, those might not be your fish or mine.

The Trout Underground’s Slaw Dog frenzy is apparently spreading like a virus to other fly fishing blogs; Guy at the immensely popular, constantly updated Fly Fishing Yellowstone blog offered his “stupid food” alternative, though not one this weight-loss hopeful is going to try:

Slaw Dogs: our neighborhood stupid eating tradition is simple; grab two of Marie Calendar’s frozen key lime pies and 3-4 pounds of Nutter Butter cookies. Great for a break. No need for silverware, just dip out the pies with the cookies. Wash it down with some good Maderia from V.Sattui. [editor: No silverware? You have to admire the eco-friendliness of it all...]

We leave you today with a couple links. The first isn’t a fly fishing link, but concerns a 15 pound cat treeing a black bear. Don’t miss it, and the next time your fishing buddy starts bragging about facing down a bear at a hot fishing spot, let him know that “hell — even a common housecat could do that…”

Then there’s an informative article about fishing wet flies on MidCurrent, which is always worth a visit. Wet flies are easy to fish, but have been largely forgotten by a sizable portion of the population (I’d like to believe I haven’t forgotten them and carry a box full of soft hackles, but don’t fish ‘em as often as I should). Good reading! See you on the river (soon), Tom Chandler.

The list of things that keep us away from fishing is a long one; work, distance, family, etc. One that’s not often on that list is “stupid leg injury due to running,” but there it is in black and white. Gimpiness meant I didn’t hit the Upper Sac yesterday evening, but (with enough ice and aspirin) it’s looking better for tonight. As always, you’ll be the second to know.

Dave Roberts called to let me know he saw very few stoneflies on the Rogue yesterday, but he basically couldn’t keep the trout off the fly. Now there’s a problem for you. (Readers should write to share their sympathies for Dave, and to tell us how you deal with this difficult problem.)

Upper Sac flows have just nudged under 2000. They’ve come down significantly lately, and I know that lower tribs have really settled down, so I’m not expecting miracles when I check the upper reaches of the river. Still, 2,000 beats 3,000, and we’re headed in the right direction.

Monday Underground Entertainment? Some good pictures of a big, brown fish from Carp on the Fly, and some nice trout artwork from Japan via the often-updated Yellowstone Fly Fishing Blog. There’s also another nice report from Urban Fly Fishing the Kelvin (complete with the dreamy landscape pictures he always produces), and finally, another odd entry from our Overseas (and out of his head) Correspondent TeeRex, who completes his search for carp fishing and slaw dogs in the bars and dives of Shanghai. It’s not pretty reading, but damnit, it’s journalism, so here it is:

I completed my investigation of Slee Zee Chen’s; no fish there, not even in the slaw dawgs. Which, by the way, I taught the short-order chef how to make. (He was about 4 ft 9 inches tall, so he is For Sure a short order chef. Get it? Geez, I crack me up.) He had to substitute chicken’s feet and pig’s snout for the toob steak, and shredded daikon radish and bok choy for the slaw, but with enough chili oil and soy sauce it tasted about the same as a slaw dawg. If you’d had enough beer, that is. I’d send a picture, but I didn’t want to completely destroy your readership.

See you on the Upper Sac, Tom Chandler.

While I remain trapped in my chair by the weight of multiple deadlines, there’s been a veritable flood of Underground-worthy news sent by Alert Readers. It’s a weird, weird world out there, and at the Underground, we’re dedicated to making that as clear as possible to you.

When I die, I want to go to heaven in… a Fish Coffin
Apparently, shaped coffins are the rage in Ghana. Wanna be buried in a fish? Coca-Cola bottle? Bible? Thanks to the Underground – and Alert Reader Gerry – you know where to go…

Why not? This looks a lot better to me than a square box… (yahoo news photo)

Massively Parallel Bass Fishing
Though I’m a bamboo & fiberglass fishing retro-grouch, I’m always on the lookout for technology that improves our lot in life. That’s why Sun Microsystem’s new game server array has made the news (and why Alert Reader Gerry sent it along); with any luck, you’ll soon be able to fish competitively online against other freakish tech geeks. Sure, Sun’s only talking Bass fishing at the moment, but expect the “A Massively Parallel River Runs Through It” version any day…

Yet More Shocking Slaw Dog News
Ian Rutter sent us this abominable “slaw dog” recipe, where our trusty tube steak treat is horribly mis-treated by modern cuisine. They substitute seared tuna for our beloved hunk of mystery meat, and then compound the crime with vegetables tossed in a “simple Oriental vinaigrette, which, when time is short, can be replaced with bottled citrus ginger dressing.”

Oh the humanity! (There is a letter to Viking in the Underground’s future). Ian somewhat snidely suggests this might be the perfect “California version” of the dog, but a little research reveals the ugly, ugly truth; Viking (the Web site hosting this affront to slaw dog lovers everywhere) is located in… Mississippi. Questions about why so many southern states overindulge in doubled letters aside, I think this illustrates a key talking point in the Underground’s upcoming political campaign: the assault against our gas station food heritage from every corner of the country.

More Carp News…
Finally, from another continent, Correspondent Mitch White reports there is no carp fishing in any bar in Tapei – at least none that he could find. Mitch is a statistician, and says he based this conclusion on “large-number” analysis, so we’re pretty sure he’s got it right. More research, he suggests, is on its way, especially at a place aptly named “Slee Zee Chen’s.” More coming from our courageous Chinese correspondent (assuming he finds his way back to the hotel).

The Upper Sac continues to slowly fall, with flows now entering the 2400 cfs range. That’s not what I’d call “happily fishable” but it is approaching the levels where you can actually accomplish something out there (though rarely gracefully). It’s a weekend for work, but there’s always a chance for a quick fishing expedition. As always, we’ll let you know. See you over the weekend, Tom Chandler.

Your penniless, wandering correspondent visited the Upper Sac yesterday, and though I managed to hook six fish, I only landed two. With the river headed back up to 3,000 cfs, I probably should have run to the middle or lower river, but chose to try the upper canyon. The water is high (and getting higher), and while fish holding areas are pretty obvious, they’re not at all easy to reach.

The Beetle Bug claimed one bite, but nothing else, and I got desperate enough to hang a weighted Hare’s Ear 18” under the dry, which is how I got my next four hookups (and a few misses, if the dry is to be believed).

With the river booming, I spent a frustrating amount of time whacking my cane rod against branches and dead limbs when I was trying to set the hook, leading to a lot of fish who wriggled free as soon as they got some slack (which was pretty quick being as I couldn’t move the rod). At these flows, downriver is probably better.

Was it gorgeous? Spring in the upper canyon always is. Easy? Not on your life. This kind of fishing is best done with a tough rod with a soft tip, so don’t bring the cannon. (Might I suggest the 8.5′ 4wt Diamondback glass rods at Raine’s shop and the Ted Fay Fly shop?)With warmer weather here (and a little rain), the river’s again headed upwards…

One more for the slaw dog…
We received a cryptic piece of investigatory journalism from Alert Reader Matt, who says: “Slaw in Charleston WV. No slaw in Pittsburg. Clearly the Mason-Dixon line.” We don’t know which administration member leaked this vital information to Matt, but we know we’re going to bravely re-print it here despite the repercussions.

As we continue to uncover new information about the slaw dog, the Underground’s Slaw Dog Expert Ian Rutter is throwing in the towel. He writes “This slaw dog thing has become a cross between The Dancing Woo Li Masters and Six Degrees of Separation. I’m going to send you a box of moonpies so you can move on.”

His all-too-obvious attempt to bury this story can mean only one thing: He’s got something to hide. We’re going to find out what. (Still love to get the moonpies tho.)

Even yesterday’s trout are weighing in on the Slaw Dog. Will it ever end?

Three days on the Upper Sac…
Don’t forget about the Upper Sacramento’s River Exchange’s package for three days at CalTrout’s rustic fishing camp located on a great stretch of the river. Tell your friends. You can help raise some money for a great organization, and have some big fun in the process.

Offbeat book…
I just finished a book titled “The Offbeat Angler” – the adventures of a couple of fly fishers who actively chase lesser-pursued fish (carp, shad, etc.), often in urban settings. The two self-described “Brown Water Boys” have written an interesting book, especially given the recent interest in non-trout species. A work of literature destined to become a classic? Maybe not, but it is an extremely entertaining read, especially their adventures with the Land Captain – a Florida guide who specializes in car-based trips to canals and offbeat places.

One of the ‘Offbeat Anglers‘ authors with a Georgetown-caught carp.

You can read an excerpt at the eponymous MidCurrent site. Expect a longer review once I’ve paid some bills. Until then, see you on the offbeat water, Tom Chandler.

]]> http://troutunderground.com/2006/06/02/upper-sac-high-chandler-2-fish-4/feed/ 5 http://troutunderground.com/2006/05/31/47/ http://troutunderground.com/2006/05/31/47/#comments Wed, 31 May 2006 15:38:53 +0000 Tom Chandler http://troutunderground.com/index.php/2006/05/31/47/

Wednesday is an odd day to post what amounts to the Monday Roundup, but those of us who are in tune with nature’s rhythms know that when the words appear (or the backlog of weird news stuff builds up), it’s time to throw it all up on the Internet to see what sticks.

First, the local news. The Upper Sac flows have spiked a bit due to the warmer weather, but they still hover in the mid-2000s, which prompts me to wonder about some of my better high water spots. Wayne Eng – who wonders less and fishes more – mentioned seeing a few mayflies (the somewhat underappreciated Pink Albert hatch). The flows aren’t great, but the river’s close by. And you never know what you might run into:

Of course, beauty is as much a part of the fly fishing experience as the fish (which are often beautiful too), but the ability to root me in the moment might be fly fishing’s biggest contribution to my hold on sanity (a tenuous one at best). While I’m fishing, life recedes, and I learn to enjoy what I’ve got because the hatch is only going to last an hour, and tomorrow it may not happen at all. In simplest terms, one day you’re Tommy – Lord of the Stoneflies and Slayer of Trout – and the next you’re scooping bird shit and moldy leaves out of the rain gutter with your hands. The lesson? Enjoy it while you can.

Feeding Time…

Ian Rutter continues the Great Underground Slaw Dog controversy that’s consumed the entire fly fishing world by posing a critical socio-culinary question: “An important question that I’d really like to find out, perhaps in my retirement, is what are the socio-geo-political boundaries of the slaw dog? I know they have them in western NC, and southwest VA, but I’m not sure how far north, south, east, and west they can be found with regularity. Slaw is offered as an add on at local Sonic drive-ins, although slaw isn’t offered at all locations. I had a slaw dog in Damascus, VA once at an ice cream and burger joint. How far does this go?”

Food helps define any fly fishing outing, whether it’s because you ate something regional and unique, or simply because you pounded junk food every day and somehow lived to tell about it. From the Amiratti’s Burrito to the Tennessee Slaw Dog (and points in between, like Sully’s bell-bottom-era Cinnamon Jerky Roll), we all seem to have a fly fishing food fixation. Here at the Underground, we want to plumb the depths of your culinary depravity. Slip us an e-mail or just post a comment with your story. Free angioplasty to the best one.

Today’s Underground Entertainment

We’ve got exciting, happy news about how global warming could create a psychotic, hyper-toxic strain of Poison Ivy (my arms are itching already), and a Moldy Chum link to a story about the fabled Skwala, the once-secret stonefly hatch whose noteriety attracts anglers and angers locals who used to have it to themselves. This writer debunks the belief that these things are hatching everywhere. They’re not.

There’s also a link to The Art of Fly Fishing, a Danish site selling some really interesting mayfly posters. It’s worth a peek. As for me, I’m trying to get some work done so I can sneak out to the river with a clear conscience. See you on the water, Tom Chandler.

]]> http://troutunderground.com/2006/05/31/47/feed/ 8 http://troutunderground.com/2006/05/22/the-monday-roundup-rain-more-rain/ http://troutunderground.com/2006/05/22/the-monday-roundup-rain-more-rain/#comments Mon, 22 May 2006 17:21:57 +0000 Tom Chandler http://troutunderground.com/index.php/?p=42

It’s raining, so this must be Monday. Cooler temperatures actually dropped Upper Sac flows a little over the weekend, but you knew the runoff would hit the river as soon as the ground was saturated, and with the river now spiking towards 9,000 cfs, I’m guessing it’s happened.

That’s OK – we’re not the only fly fishing destination trying to keep our heads above a tidal wave of largely trout-free water. A quick check on the very useful Fly Fishing Yellowstone blog (now a link in the sidebar) shows that even the rivers whose names drop very, very loudly are seeing unruly flows to the point that you’re better off fishing the grassy banks than the river itself. (What flies do you use to catch grass trout? The night crawler version of the San Juan worm??)

Still, all is not lost in the Golden State as illustrated by Alert Underground Reader Jim Troyer, who has been fly fishing the SoCal surf before going to work. We quote:

“As for fishing, I’ve been pounding the water before work (grey light sessions). When the tide is right, I’ve been finding some good long troughs and holes where our finned friends hang out. I had three Corbina on the other day but lost two because of knot failure, and the third took a run and popped off. This is the fly I’ve been using, it’s called a “Razzler” and I tie a version similar but much thinner (the Nicole Richie version).” [Jim Troyer photo]

We applaud Jim’s fishing ethic, and as a reward for making the Underground’s Monday wrapup, we’re sending him two pieces of monofilament line so he can practice his knots, and a slaw dog because he missed the big Slawdog Cookout here on the Upper Sac (and Jim, we’re sending them media mail, so we can safely say the Slaw Dog will be reaching “maturity” when it arrives).

Ian Rutter – another Underground Regular – has been guiding his fingers to the bone, working pretty much every day since I left the Slaw dog-rich environs of Tennessee in early May. The fishing’s been pretty good which certainly lightens the load on any guide, but guiding that much would drive me to a slaw dog addiction, if not worse. In an obvious attempt to minimize the importance of our recent Slaw Dog cookout, Ian jealously mentioned that no Slaw Dog-oriented revelry would be complete without a Moon Pie for dessert. Damn. We’re going to have to do it all again.

For now, it’s back to work for me, though in an act of pure optimism, I bought a new pair of light hiking boots in preparation for fishing the area’s more remote alpine lakes and streams this summer. Hopeful or foolishly optimistic? We’ll know by this fall…

Coming soon to a Trout Underground near you, we’re going to liberate a few more stories from Montana Correspondent Sully’s past, and hopefully get a few of the better local fly patterns tied and photographed. See you underwater, TC.

]]> http://troutunderground.com/2006/05/22/the-monday-roundup-rain-more-rain/feed/ 4 http://troutunderground.com/2006/05/19/40/ http://troutunderground.com/2006/05/19/40/#comments Fri, 19 May 2006 15:10:38 +0000 Tom Chandler http://troutunderground.com/index.php/?p=40

It rained lightly last night, and river flows have actually exceeded the 6,000 cfs mark. With most local options looking grim, I’m staging an afternoon jailbreak and heading into the hills to what might best be described as “Longshot Lake.” This is little more than an opportunity to waste $3.21-a-gallon gasoline, but a long shot is better than no shot at all.

Our Montana correspondent Sully reports that his local river (the Clark Fork) is doing a passable imitation of the Amazon, and a recent viewing of the Gallatin revealed a river of slurry. It’s tough times all over.

The Slaw Dog story continues to break, and to those who wrote about the possibility of multiple versions of the cabbaged tube steak, I believe that yes – the Eastern and Western species are subtly different. I believe the Western species is the slightly larger slawusdoggus jeffersonius, with the Eastern species best described as slawusdoggus phillipssixtysixus. Look for more scientific discussion of this important topic in the days to come.

Dovetailing nicely with our ongoing “ultimate fly fishing food” discussion was the discovery of an old Sully e-mail from last year’s “Amiratti’s Buritto – the perfect fly fishing fuel?” thread. The ever-vigilant Sully brought to light a culinary powerhouse from the “pre-movie” era that deserves a revival of its own. I quote:

During my early solo trips to Montana (sonny, we’re talking 1970-72), I used to subsist on Eddy’s Cinnamon Rolls. Basically spiraled hardtack case-hardened with yummy cinnamon and sugar, the things never spoiled, and, upon ingestion, swelled enough to stave off hunger pangs. One of them could be made to last for a couple of days. With maybe a dozen Eddys’ the Donner Party would have become just a prolonged snow-day. When we moved to Butte in 1982 I was stunned to learn that the Eddy’s Bread Company there no longer made the cinnamon rolls. A few of them probably still sit on back shelves SOMEWHERE in southwest Montana. Fresh as ever.

If I make it out this afternoon, look for a report… See you betting the longshots, TC

P.S. — A quick check of my referral pages throws up a site I hadn’t seen before: “Ass Hooked Whitey.” A quick visit reveals a no-holds barred site that’s definitely worth a visit. Those offended by a counter-culture approach to fly fishing need not apply…

The hot weather in the Upper Sacramento River Canyon is melting snow and driving flows ever higher – the river’s nudging an amazing 6,000 cfs (historical data suggest 1500 cfs is average), and the upward trend continues.

Despite the fact the Upper Sac’s currently best suited for use by whitewater enthusiasts with a death wish, I’ve noticed I still check the river whenever I drive by. Call it the power of possibility.

In a stunning illustration of the phrase “Resistance is Futile,” Chris Raine dragged his drift boat to Lake Siskiyou. There, he found himself perched atop a body of chocolate milk, the South Fork booming like the Rolling Stones in an undersized concert hall.

What this means is that I’m stuck running yet another slaw dog picture – this one from the big Underground Slaw Dog Festival of Tuesday night. Most of the participants enjoyed the mighty slaw dog for the first time, and reaction was overwhelmingly positive (the initial reaction anyway; no word on residual effects).

The Western Slaw Dog; bigger body and more olive in the slaw than the Eastern species…

For those who are similarly trapped by raging waters and an unreasonable need to make a living, here’s today’s Underground Entertainment. First – as an interesting alternative to Mad About You reruns – I suggest an educational Podcast (basically on-demand Internet radio) with Kelly Galloup about fishing streamers. After my recent streamer follies in Tennessee, I’ve developed a newfound respect for the techniques involved. Give it a listen.

Second, there’s an interesting New Zealand fishing site that’s worth a look. Visit Bish on Fish and see what you can find.

Finally, those of us who like smooth-casting fly rods (that fish better than so many of the pool cues offered for sale today) will be saddened to learn of the death of J. Kennedy Fisher, whose company sold some wonderful fiberglass and graphite rods (and built blanks for the likes of Winston). Tight loops Mr. Fisher…

Due to overwhelming demand (and several thinly veiled threats from Dave Edmondson), Tuesday evening will find me hosting a Tennessee Slaw Dog cookout at the Trout Underground World Headquarters.

For those who can’t make it but wish to simultaneously participate in this homage to Eastern Tennessee gas station food, the equipment list for the original slaw dog is as follows:

1. Thin, pink hot dog (boiled)

2. White hot dog bun

3. Bright yellow mustard from a bright yellow plastic squeeze bottle

4. Chopped white onions

5. Canned chili (no beans)

6. Creamy, sweet cole slaw chopped fine

Though the original gas station dog was boiled, we’re going to grill a higher-quality (girthier) dog. Otherwise, we’re going to stay true to the original ingredients (if I learned anything watching those sci-fi movies about giant radioactive ants, it’s that playing god often has dire consequences). Whether this results in an authentic slaw dog remains to be seen, but since I may be the only person in attendance equipped to judge, I’m pretty sure we’re going to hit it out of the park.

Of course, some will see this as simply a chance to eat bad food and wash it down with good beer. Others (people of vision like myself) see it in larger, more universal terms; it’s a way to emphasize the essential humanity of all god’s children, and to do this, we’re going to connect the two widely divergent cultures of Eastern Tennessee and mountainous Northern California with a junk-food bridge.

Unlike other fly fishing sites – which provide little beyond information about catching fish – the Trout Underground has embarked on a far loftier mission: We’re bringing humanity together – one bad meal at a time. See you Tuesday, TC.

The river’s apparently blown by last night’s rain (running 3.5 feet in Townsend where it normally runs 2 feet – and stop me when all this sounds too familiar…). I took the opportunity to drive to the local Phillips 66 gas station – home of the fabled, much-anticipated, Tennessee Slaw Dog.

Even in full repose, the slaw dog does not give up its secrets easily…
.
I think it says a lot for a region when you can buy an artery killing lunch delicacy at 10:20 in the morning, and the helpful woman behind the counter pointed out that she’d build a hot dog with any of the fixin’s, but that the slaw dog was most accurately represented by the traditional mustard/onions/chili/slaw combo. I ordered one (strictly for journalistic purposes), and dived in.

For perhaps the first time ever, the delicate nature of this culinary masterpiece is revealed to the fly fishing world…

I have to say the slaw dog is a close contendor for the title of “The Ultimate Underground Fly Fishing Fuel”, with the Amarrati’s burrito putting up stiff competition. Both foods (and I’m applying the term loosely here) will leave you with a song in your heart (and probably skid marks on your waders), and I think the ultimate decision is one of preference. The slaw dog offers a delicate melange of tastes, though I think I’d ask for extra onions if I were to order again.

The burrito travels better, and is far more receptive to the warming rays of the microwave. The Slaw dog goes down quickly and easily, and requires only a single hand for consumption – an important consideration given the twisty nature of the park’s roads.

I’m going to mull over this critical topic in my head while I go fishing (thereby testing the long-term ramifications of slaw dog consumption). For now, enjoy the worldwide exclusive – yet another example of the kind of hard-hitting journalism you’ve come to expect from the Trout Underground. See you at the Pulitzers, TC.