The Top Seven Guide Warning Signs
7) Front seat backrest in drift boat has bullet holes with powder burns on rower’s side
6) Insists on tying your fly to tippet, but uses bow tie knot
5) “I Brake For Human Flesh” bumper sticker on truck
4) Guarantees you’ll catch boatloads of 20″ trout, then backs boat trailer into a wall saying “Wow, thought I had a another 20″ of room.”
3) Thinks PBR is real beer, not fermented horse urine
2) “Super secret” spot occupied by two dozen other fishermen, and when you mention it, he says “What fishermen?”
1) Mumbles angrily to himself about last client not tipping while drawing pentagram on boat in fresh blood
8)…thinks you have a pretty mouth
9)….wants to show you his script of “Saw- The Musical”
10)….thinks bamboo is effete and swishy
JP2(Quote)
11) Repeatedly uses the phrase “squeal like a pig” when loading up the boat…
Tom Chandler(Quote)
Watched an interview with Burt Reynolds were he explained that he had worked with the actor who uttered those lines at the old western attraction Tweetsie Railroad in the mountains of NC. He went on to say that he’d taken the guy aside before the scene and told him to make it realistic. It was so realistic that Burt thought Ned hadn’t been the same since.
Ed(Quote)
Ned Beatty was a fine actor; it’s too bad that’s the scene he seems best remembered for…
Tom Chandler(Quote)
12) Switches gear to canoe from drift boat and grabs a botlle of wine, sets off. then starts playing with his fly rod kinda funny. Mentions he likes Anderson Cooper on TV and Lisa Minelli music in the shower. You figure, this guy is not getting a tip, no way.
Punahele(Quote)
PBR isn’t real beer? Uh oh….
David(Quote)
Some of us have our doubts.
Tom Chandler(Quote)
PBR is to beer what Eagle Claw is to fly fishing. Neither are very refined or of very good quality BUT they do get the job done. There is something to be said for utility. :)
David(Quote)
Maybe, but nobody’s waving Eagle Claw rods around the campsite in an attempt to make themselves look cool… 8-)
Tom Chandler(Quote)
Uses 666x tippet material.
DarrellKuni(Quote)
Doesn’t everyone? It’s the tippet of the beast.
Tom Chandler(Quote)
I recomend Bush Light It is Very nice with all kind of foods and a real pleasure on the hottest days and also coldest nights by the fire. Vesatile Also its huge attractiveness is affordability, A 30 pack won’t strain your wallet but just your bladder. Micro-brews are great but they will put you in the poor house and drinking wine at dinner.
Punahele(Quote)
13) …has Free the Lemurians sticker on his drift boat…
14)….scans the sky for black helicopters,scans the river for ‘invasive” coho….
JP2(Quote)
Extra bonus points for topical Siskiyou County references…
Tom Chandler(Quote)