People doing foolish things in the outdoors is hardly new, though the latest GPS, cell phone and emergency beacon technology seems to actually be encouraging people to strive for new heights in stupidity.

At least according to this article from the New York Times:

People with cellphones call rangers from mountaintops to request refreshments or a guide; in Jackson Hole, Wyo., one lost hiker even asked for hot chocolate.

A French teenager was injured after plunging 75 feet this month from the South Rim of the Grand Canyon when he backed up while taking pictures. And last fall, a group of hikers in the canyon called in rescue helicopters three times by pressing the emergency button on their satellite location device. When rangers arrived the second time, the hikers explained that their water supply “tasted salty.”

“Because of having that electronic device, people have an expectation that they can do something stupid and be rescued,” said Jackie Skaggs, spokeswoman for Grand Teton National Park in Wyoming.

“Every once in a while we get a call from someone who has gone to the top of a peak, the weather has turned and they are confused about how to get down and they want someone to personally escort them,” Ms. Skaggs said. “The answer is that you are up there for the night.”

Last winter, someone in the Rockies kept scrambling the Search & Rescue folks by firing off their emergency beacon, only to turn it off after a couple hours.

This happened several weekends in a row, and when the culprit was finally found, it seems they thought their emergency beacon was simply an avalanche beacon – something you turn on when entering avalanche areas so your friends can dig you out after you’ve been buried.

Oops.

Every fly fisherman knows (or should) that breaking a leg on a little visited stream can mean a long wait for rescue – or a nasty drag out.

And while cell phones offer us some small comfort, I can guess the response if I dialed the L&T and suggested she drop everything because I ran out of water and was a little thirsty.

Apparently the same thing didn’t occur to these fools (again from the NYT article):

Last fall, two men with teenage sons pressed the help button on a device they were carrying as they hiked the challenging backcountry of Grand Canyon National Park. Search and rescue sent a helicopter, but the men declined to board, saying they had activated the device because they were short on water.

The group’s leader had hiked the Grand Canyon once before, but the other man had little backpacking experience. Rangers reported that the leader told them that without the device, “we would have never attempted this hike.”

The group activated the device again the next evening. Darkness prevented a park helicopter from flying in, but the Arizona Department of Public Safety sent in a helicopter whose crew could use night vision equipment.

The hikers were found and again refused rescue. They said they had been afraid of dehydration because the local water “tasted salty.” They were provided with water.

Helicopter trips into the park can cost as much as $3,400 an hour, said Maureen Oltrogge, a spokeswoman for Grand Canyon National Park.

So perhaps it is no surprise that when the hikers pressed the button again the following morning, park personnel gave them no choice but to return home. The leader was issued a citation for creating hazardous conditions in the parks.

Older Bro carries an emergency beacon on his solo backpacking trips, and given that he’s tremendously old and parts are already falling off, I can see why he’d do it.

Then again, he’s been backpacking since his teens, so he’s not prone to doing stupid things – or pushing the panic button because he’d like a drink with an umbrella in it delivered to his campsite.

Man’s relationship to wild places has always been a complex one.

The problem today is that distressing number of people simply have no relationship with wild places, but expect technology to substitute for a fundamental lack of knowledge (and a stunning lack of common sense).

It’s a little like expecting a high-modulus graphite fly rod to substitute for a lack of casting ability; in both cases, technology’s a useful tool, but a poor crutch for those lacking knowledge or common sense.

See you on the rescue copter, Tom Chandler.

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