Special Offer: The Underground’s “Fly Fisherman Core Strengthening Boot Camp” – at 50% Off!

At this very moment, you’re probably surfing porn sitting around asking yourself this very question: “Why wait until spring to get into ‘fly fishing shape’ when I can do it now – and at a hugely discounted price?”

We thought so.

That’s why – in a truly humanitarian gesture – the Trout Underground is pleased to announce that its unique, celebrity endorsed* Fly Fishing Core Strengthening Boot Camp is now available to its readers at less than half price.

“What’s the Underground’s Fly Fishing Core Strengthening Boot Camp” you say?

We’re glad you asked.

It’s day after day of shoveling snow from the TU/Man Cave driveway a proprietary, scientifically proven strengthening program that uses snow the Underground’s patented**, H2O-based viscous elastomeric training material, which is scientifically proven to build core strength in days – not the weeks needed to build it on the river.

We guarantee you six-pack abs***, powerful lats (whatever the hell they are), steroid-like Mark McGwire-esque arms, and a pyramid-shaped physique (upside-down pyramid) that absolutely slays the babes.

All you have to do is beat the next winter storm up to Trout Underground/Man Cave World Headquarters (that gives you about 18 hours), and we’ll do the rest – including the development of a specific set of core-strengthening exercises designed specifically for you.

Plus, our professional, PhD-level trainers**** will tell you where to shovel supervise your custom training program to produce maximum snow removal results.

BUT WAIT – THERE’S MORE

Not content to simply build a physique that will make you the envy of every man (or woman) in the room?

Ready to do more with your life than simply score the drunkest hottest babes on the planet?

Isn’t it time you reared up on your hind legs and straddled the planet like the colossus you are?

WE AGREE!

That’s why – at no additional charge to you (and remember, you’re getting this all at 50% off already) – we’re prepared to offer you The Trout Underground’s Mental Strength Toughening Program at the same time!! (Yes, that’s two excalamation points.)

Once you’ve completed this course (which involves sleeping in a flimsy tent in the snow and eating inadequate rations of bad food when you’re not shoveling snow), you’ll laugh at everyday trials and tribulations.

You’ll brush off the “get lost, creep” replies from beautiful women that used to stymie you, and never take “no” for an answer again*****.

You’ll look your boss right in the eye, and – secure in the knowledge that he couldn’t shovel snow move a metric ton of the Underground’s patented**, H2O-based viscous elastomeric training material – tell him to take this job and shove it.

In simple terms, we’re not offering you a miserable, frozen week moving snow huge biceps and a good shot at waking up next to a famous Hollywood actress.

No, we’re offering you much, much more: a real shot a frostbite and lingering post-traumatic stress a better, more fulfilling life.

But only if you call now. Operators are standing by to help you take the first step to your new – and much, much better – life******.

“I owe my awesome casting prowess – and ability to score with the babes at will – entirely to the Trout Underground’s Core Strengthening Boot Camp” — Lefty Kreh*******

© 2010, Trout Underground/Man Cave Offshore Ltd.

(*No celebrities endorsed this)
(**Not patented)
(***Not a guarantee)
(****No professionals work here)
(*****Not responsible for loss of job or restraining orders)
(******Survival not guaranteed)
(********He never said this)

Technorati Tags: fly fishing core strength boot camp, masters of the universe, snow removal

Tagged as: fly fishing core strength boot camp, masters of the universe, snow removal