William Chandler: Husband, Father, Superman
By Tom Chandler on May 9, 2008 in Writing
When you’re young you believe your dad is invincible, and then one day you realize he’s human, and then comes the truly horrible period where you wonder if he’s your dad at all because he’s hopelessly unhip, and then you arrive at the stretch where you finally get to know your father as an adult, which is by far the best part.
After that (usually a lot of years after that) you realize that living through a great depression and surviving front line combat in a terrible war — and then slipping into harness and doing the supremely hard work of feeding and raising a family (and making sure there’s enough for everyone to go to college) means – cape or not – your dad actually did have super powers, and not the flashy comic book kind, but the badass real life variety (though if it ever came down to a contest, he’d kick Superman’s ass every damn time).
Of course, even Superman had a weakness, and my father’s was his heart, and it finally gave out, and he passed away this morning.
When the call comes, you sit down right where you are to a jarring mix of emotions, and you don’t know whether to simply stop breathing and melt into the ground or stand up and shake your fist at the sky, though the sense of someone kicking out a corner of the foundation you’ve built your life on prevents you from doing either.
You know you’ll eventually find some perspective on all this, but at the moment, you realize you can no longer feel the phone against your face.
Rest in peace, Superman. Know that your sons finally came to understand what you were and what you did, and that we loved you for it.
William Chandler, 1931-2008
kbarton10 | May 9, 2008 | Reply
I’m mighty sorry to hear of your loss, Tom.
ed h- | May 9, 2008 | Reply
my sympathy to you tom-
Chuck Sams | May 9, 2008 | Reply
I am truly sorry for your loss Tom. I, like you before today, could only imagine the void left from the passing of great men. Especially if that man taught you how to fish.
The river will comfort.
guido | May 9, 2008 | Reply
Tom,
Mighty sorry for your loss. My heart and prayers go out to you and yours.
Guido
Mike | May 9, 2008 | Reply
Tom - I am sorry for your loss.
take a break…see you in a few days.
My sympathies to your family.
Brian Bennett | May 9, 2008 | Reply
As I cradle my newborn baby daughter I’m suddenly touched by the life of a man I never had the chance know.
From one dad to another, rest in peace William Chandler.
Brian Bennett | May 9, 2008 | Reply
As I cradle my newborn baby daughter I’m suddenly touched by the life of a man I never had the chance to know.
From one dad to another, rest in peace William Chandler.
Roger W | May 9, 2008 | Reply
My thoughts are with you during this difficult time.
Ed | May 9, 2008 | Reply
Very sorry to hear, my condolences and sympathies to you and your family. Touching and appropriate words you used to describe our relationships with our fathers.
shastacc | May 9, 2008 | Reply
TC-
I got that phone call 33 years ago. Rocked my world.
You have my heart and my sympathy. See you when you come home.
CC
ijsouth | May 9, 2008 | Reply
Very sorry to hear of your loss…I lost my father a few years ago, and he was a similar age - that great generation is slipping into history.
Loon | May 9, 2008 | Reply
Sorry to hear about your fathers passing. He lives on in you. Take care of yourself and your family.
blueklister | May 9, 2008 | Reply
Thanks Tom. Your words speak for all four of us. He quietly passed on strengths to us that made us who and what we are today. I think his greatest trait was his integrity and that will forever shine in us.
Scott Chandler
Smellslikefish | May 9, 2008 | Reply
That was quite a touching eulogy, Tom. Condolences to you and your family.
Reed | May 10, 2008 | Reply
Now, in the countless worlds of God your father begins whole new adventures - while your bonds to each other just grow stronger.
Remembering you in prayer,
Reed
Kilgore Trout | May 10, 2008 | Reply
I’m so sorry for your loss. Please accept my deepest sympathies for you and your family. As a new father, I was especially touched by how eloquently you described your Dad. Fathers like him (and mine) are the ones who show us what it means to be a man. It sounds like he was a tremendous influence on you, and I’m sure his memories, his values, and his ethics will live on with you for years and years to come.
I’m sure the following days will be busy for you. If you can, when the dust settles, try to get out on the water. As I’m sure you know, nothing soothes the soul like flowing water and rising fish.
Take care,
KT
Salty | May 10, 2008 | Reply
My condolences Tom
Murdock | May 10, 2008 | Reply
Tom,
The wife and I both send our sympathy and want you to know that you and your family are in our thoughts and prayers. Your writings stand as a very fitting tribute to your father.
Lee & Larissa
hugh koontz | May 10, 2008 | Reply
What a beautiful tribute to what must have been a beautiful man.
Prayers with you, Tom.
Harry | May 10, 2008 | Reply
My condolences on your loss. My father (and my mother) are both of that same generation that lived through the depression and the war.
Luckily, I have not yet received that phone call and I only hope that when it does come as it surely will, I am able to handle it as well as you have. Very touching eulogy.
Best wishes
Harry
Bruno Greco | May 10, 2008 | Reply
Sorry for you loss. Your family will be in my prayers. You have made me laugh over the past year, get motivated against companies like nestle(I quit drinking bottled water because of what I learned here), and now weep. You father sounds like an amazing man, may he rest in peace.
Bruno
winehiker | May 10, 2008 | Reply
Gosh, Tom, I’m truly sorry for your loss. Yours are powerful sentiments, you expressed them very eloquently, and they resonate with me. Perhaps your dad and mine will now get a chance to cast out a couple of lines together in the river of the afterlife.
hawgdaddy | May 10, 2008 | Reply
Tom,
I never have words for times like this, and there really aren’t any that help. All I can say is, I’m truly sorry for your loss, and I will remember you in my prayers, for whatever that’s worth.
Nathan
Heddon17 | May 10, 2008 | Reply
That was a very touching eulogy, Tom. My condolences to you and your family.
Alice Pauls | May 10, 2008 | Reply
Tom
Your dad and mom were our neighbors for a long time, and the best of people. All of the positive adjectives fit your dad … honest, trustworthy, caring, intelligent, informed, appreciative, steady, and one who, with your mom, raised good men. Our youngest daughter was devastated yesterday, when hearing of your dad’s death. Your parents were like an aunt and uncle next door.
God Bless you and your brothers.
Larry Leake | May 10, 2008 | Reply
My sincere condolences on the loss of your father. Even though my own dad passed away thirty-six years ago, when I was twelve, I still catch myself wanting - needing- to speak with him about the milestones in my life, good or bad. It seems that you were able to resolve the inevitable conflict between a man and his son; for that, you are most fortunate. Take some time for yourself, Tom….
Big Giant of Slate Creek | May 10, 2008 | Reply
Only one thing makes Big Giant cry…
He will offer Tobacco and Prayers for your Dad to the Great Father, and wishes warmth and love to surround You and your Woman and family.
Don | May 10, 2008 | Reply
Tom,
You and your family have my sincere condolences.
I lost my father in 1994 and even now it’s a rare day when dad does not enter my thoughts.
I never go fishing without talking to dad and I like to believe he hears me and is smiling.
Don
samistopdog | May 10, 2008 | Reply
Never met the man, “Your Dad”…but from what I read here…
“He’d do to ride the river with”
(single most important statement a Law man can make)…simply means your back is covered, no need to worry.
Heartfelt condolences Tom, to you and your family.
Monty Montana…aka…Stephen Johnson
Gentleman Jim | May 10, 2008 | Reply
Tom,
May I add mine to the sincerely felt condolences here from r your friends.
I lost my own father 3 years ago. He was only in his fifties, but he’s given me the finest inheritance possible - a sense of wonder and a love of the river. Your old man must be looking down with wonder and pride, though, to see what a diverse crowd you’ve already inspired yourself, and I trust you’ll have the chance, before long, to remember him out on the water, where it all makes at least a little more sense.
Best wishes to you and your family.
James
Jim T. | May 10, 2008 | Reply
So sorry to hear Tom. I lost my Dad back in 98′ and even thou I know he fought till the end, he was at peace. The good thing is, I’ll see him again one day! Your in our thoughts and prayers…..
Jim
Fernando | May 10, 2008 | Reply
Tom,
I am very sorry for your loss. Your father was a great friend of mine and a magnificent mentor since the day he (and your Super Mother) first moved into his latest home. He taught me so much and filled many voids that I had since the loss of my father when I was 3. You and your brothers are sooo blessed to have experienced such a great father. “Superman” indeed.
Fernando
Ian & Charity | May 10, 2008 | Reply
Hey Tom,
We just saw the post about your Dad.
Our hearts, thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
Know that we love you.
Ian & Charity
Beaverkill | May 10, 2008 | Reply
Thoughts and prayers to you and your family..
Dave N | May 10, 2008 | Reply
Tom-
Sorry to hear about your father. Hang in there.
Touching words you wrote today…
Alastair Ingram | May 10, 2008 | Reply
Tom, very sad to read this. Be glad you got to know him as you did. I don’t know you or your Dad, but your words brought tears to my eyes thinking about my Dad.
RIP Superman.
Bill DeSavage | May 11, 2008 | Reply
Tom,
We are sorry to hear of your Dad passing.
Bill and Jean
fishskicanoe | May 11, 2008 | Reply
You have my deepest sympathies, Tom.
Sully | May 11, 2008 | Reply
Strong eulogy for a super man.
Condolences to you, your brothers and especially your mother.
NickB | May 11, 2008 | Reply
Tom,
So sorry for your loss. It sounds like your father was a great man.
I’ll keep you both in my thoughts and prayers.
SAltsh | May 11, 2008 | Reply
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. This is the time of year when my brothers and I would take a weekend to fish the Adirondacks with my Dad each year - your post reminded me of how important that time was. Be good to yourselves at this difficult time.
Regards, Steve
Mike W | May 11, 2008 | Reply
Tom,
I am sorry for your loss.You and your family are in our prayers.
Mike
fishhead | May 11, 2008 | Reply
Tom,
Our thoughts and condolences go out to you and your family. Know that he lives on in you and what he has given you. Be at peace and know that your father is truly free, and his time here well spent.
fishhead
AL flygirl | May 11, 2008 | Reply
Sorry to hear about your dad. Thoughts and prayers with you and your family.
Mark Ostrom | May 12, 2008 | Reply
Tom…
My Deepest sympathies. How about a story about your Dad once in a while… we’d all love to read them!
Let the River be your therapist, my friend, and rest
easy.
Mark O
David Roberts | May 12, 2008 | Reply
Tom, I knew your father, and he was a great man. Tell your Mother, and Brothers, as for yourself, and Nancy, Linda and my prays are with you. Call any time.
David & Linda
Steve Bacon | May 12, 2008 | Reply
Sorry for your loss Tom.
Thoughts and prayers,
Steve
oatka | May 12, 2008 | Reply
Sorry to hear about your loss. Enjoy the memories you have!
Clay | May 12, 2008 | Reply
God bless you Tom.
Clay | May 12, 2008 | Reply
God bless you Tom.
Dean | May 12, 2008 | Reply
Rest in Peace William
SMJ | May 12, 2008 | Reply
I’m very sorry for your loss.
Greg | May 12, 2008 | Reply
Tom,
Sorry to read of your loss. I got that same telephone call in April of 1984. Like you, my dad was always my hero and truly the center of my life. Every time I go fishing I’m reminded of him taking me fishing for the first time.
I do know that trout streams have a special healing quality.
Pete | May 12, 2008 | Reply
Sorry for your loss, Tom.
Will and Abby | May 12, 2008 | Reply
We’re sorry to hear it, Tom…I’m sure your father was proud to have a son capable of writing such a moving eulogy.
May you and your family be given the time and space needed for a proper fairwell.
Peace, Will and Abby
Sharon Smith Yuba Sutter Bike Club | May 12, 2008 | Reply
I know what you’re feeling. I lost my dad, best friend, biking buddy two years ago. The loss is deep, but the sweet memories linger……..
Kentucky Jim | May 12, 2008 | Reply
Tom, sorry about your dad. I’ve been there. It’s never easy. I think somebody said the river will heal.
Regards,
KJ
Michael Burns | May 12, 2008 | Reply
Congratulations to your Dad on a life well lived. I am glad he went easily and given his heart and Korea lived long. The baton has been passed. How will you honor him?
mike | May 13, 2008 | Reply
Very sad to hear about your loss Tom. All the best from Scotland.
Mike
Michelle | May 13, 2008 | Reply
Tom,
So sorry to hear about your father. I hope he had many joys. You and your family are in our thoughts and prayers.
Michelle & Val